Saturday, December 27, 2008


the rain pit-pats on my fake wooden walls. its chilly even with the fan switched off. the bed looks so cozy and tempting for an early night.

2 great parties happening at this instant. neither one in kb. well this wouldn't be kb if there were happening parties. if it did, then kb would be the new penang which is the new kl. now that would be shocking.

while everyone i know is busy getting warm and cozy with mr. jack, or getting low on the dance floor, i have much to prepare for tomorrow. a briefing that will be useful only in a very long time from now. a relatively early night i shall have compared to my counterparts who i'm sure are in awe and flabbergasted with self over-the-topness. or those just plainly curious as cats. that's family right?

prioritize what i want. what i need. sacrifices aren't easy to make. they sometimes feel like salt to wound. piercing.

well at least i've got my pills to accompany me. and antibiotics too. swell ain't it?

Friday, December 26, 2008

Lost & Found Bitter Pills

its been chilly for quite some time. the locals say, "the monsoon's not over, till kelantan floods". till now, i've only heard of terengganu flooding this year. so i guess we're expecting a second downfall soon.

more bad weather.

the hide and seek rain hasn't helped. came down with fever last week but have recovered since. due to the flying schedule, i made myself see the doctor so the fever wouldn't annoy my life long. i came back with a bunch of pills.

pills and i do not have a good history. when i was younger, i couldn't take the taste of medicine. the slightest taste of the bitter pill would see me puking gallons. worst of all are those pills that are easily dilutable. they intoxicate your entire mouth at the minimal-est contact with water. YUCK!

as such my predicament that till now i situate the pill as near as possible to my throat and quickly gulp it down with water. i can never comprehend how some can guzzle few pills down at once, or leave it in their mouth while finishing a sentence. i think i'd be laying over the sink for hours. but thank God for pharmacist who have invented tasteless pills. pills don't taste as awful now, as they did few years back.

this is with the exception of the stomachache pills. they taste as horrible as before. i took them few days ago and they started to dilute so fast. i almost started puking. it brought back baddd memories of bitter pills. even those bad memories made me feel like puking *urghhh*

i'm horrible with pills.

there is a lil form pasted in the laundry room titled LOST/FOUND, to inform people of lost or found clothings, coz sometimes buckets get mixed during the washing wait.
it goes something like:
date. name. found a renoma underwear. white colour. please collect from ...
believe this or not, someone actually lost a whole bucket full of clothes, ALONG WITH the blue bucket. that's so pitiful. i don't think he lost it by accident though, maybe someone dengki him? how can you loose an entire bucket?
maybe somebody wanted his g-strings??? hmmm...

Wednesday, December 24, 2008

i hate it

when people borrow my stuff, never return it (this part still ok), and when you ask them to return it, they give you a monotonous denial of ever taking it.

worst. is when the above situation, is replied with a double loose end; meaning they are pleading guilty but don't give flying fishes about it, or they just don't give a flying fish about the item coz they're through with em AND trying to indicate that they could have returned it even though there's no actual proof of the return transaction. could have.

yeah merry xmas. have a very merry xmas.

Tuesday, December 09, 2008

I Don't Get Lucky

with the girls.

however, i unfortunately attract the very elder generation who equal my grandmother's age. i was at a mamak shop having dinner, then headed to the sink to wash my hands. i had to pass this really old mak cik to get to it. and she didn't seem like harm. sitting there with her probable husband of half a century on the opposite end, with a table clear of orders.

as i passed her, she stopped me with a wave and said,

she: adik nak pergi mana?

me: ermmm... basuh tangan.

she: duduk kat mana?

me: ermmm sana (while randomly points to the road)

i hurried away quickly. why am i so lucky? she had teeth as many fingers i have O.o

" which is worst,
not getting everything you wished for,
or getting it but realizing it's not enough? "
- OneTreeHill -

Monday, December 08, 2008

Transporter 3

it used to be Milla Jovovich. now someone else keeps staring at me. with those sultry pair of eyes. ruffled hair. pouting lips.

i'd like a Penelope Cruz pleaseeee???

we were at city square few hours ago. since it was still early, we decided to watch Transporter 3. i don't think i watched part 2, and i assumed correctly that part 2 had no connections whatsoever with part 3. so that was good.

i remember watching part 1, all because of shu qi. the porn star. but that was many years ago.

anyways, the movie was good. its an action flick, so don't expect much of a storyline.

what means preoccupied?

something interesting happen though. IvanTheTerrible and NigelTheBrat joined in. they were good at the movies actually. i expected them to be complaining or making noise or crying like usual brats in cinemas, but surprisingly they behaved. NTB however fell asleep probably 30mins through the show.

ITT enjoyed the movie. he didn't make noise. not until the end of the movie.

when jason statham's name appeared signalling the end, while ushers rushed to open the exit doors, ITT shrieked:


then the crying began.

Saturday, December 06, 2008

Follow Me

not the brand, but an instruction to my blog. so tak malu heh?

hahaha... well, just realized someone is following my blog. thank you very much, don't know how i got your attention, but appreciate it very much since this blog has been rather small.

though i'm not very sure who you are. i think you're sy, but there's no blogs under your control, so that confused me. then again, there's the mas tie-clip and gold bars. but then again, industry says "internet"? hmmm...

y, please identify yourself. say POB, endurance, registration please. maintain following level. call again when establish chronicles.

thanks for the add again. i am unbelieveably honoured. i'd just add people on my "addictive list" to say i follow their blog. but i think this new widget makes life a lil more simpler, though its gonna take me time to get used to it.

it was an unwelcomed re-acquaintance the other day. maybe that's what he specializes in? though i'm not spiritual enough to be attending other ceremonies. i'd just sit and blink.
the entire time i resonated:
... i hate this part right here ...
circumstances, situations, fate never fail to surprise me with questions.

Friday, December 05, 2008

Since My Mom Decided To Go To Europe...

1) the fridge decided to defrost items we wanted frosted. its been sent to the repairman thankfully.

2) the lightbulbs and starters in the hall decided to malfunction, leaving us in darkness. luckily i've had many experiences changing it in the hostel in kb where voltage archings were common.

3) today the pipe in the toilet decided to come loose and burst out with gushing water. blank with no clue what to do, i turned off the main pipe supply outside. then there was the problem of air bubbles in the pipeline

i'm watching jimmy kimmel live, some repeated episode. he says:

there is a new show on mtv, Paris Hilton's New Best Friend. so there are 16 girls and one confused guy competing to be her new best friend...
she'll sing to me:
" ... but you're just a boy... you don't understand... "

Thursday, November 27, 2008

Beneath Us

its a never ending learning journey. since young we're taught about manners, discipline, etiquettes, etc etc by our parents. as we grow older, we lose them.

stuff we're taught as kids, slowly become beneath us for some. as we age, we gain a sense of self, believing we're better than others, slowly infused with a thin wisp of ego that eventually boils to a thick belief of me-myself-and-i.

the other day, i helped an instructor invigilate a mock exam. yerppp, me. (oooo-wow-weeeee!)

so the charts are laminated. and some of us highlight over it to ease our problem solving. what irks me, is the not erasing part.

along the way, we loose what we've learnt. most often than not, we need an outsider to remind us of it, say our teachers, lecturers, instructors or mentors. at an age of defiance, we need someone who towers over us, not physically, to reinstall those lost parts.

back in the exam hall, i just gently reminded them, "please clean the charts".

the obvious reply, "wasn't me that drew. before this already had".

after many attempts, i decided it wasn't gonna work. so i gave up, and went with, "if you've marked the charts, please erase your markings", hoping some self-realization will set in. it fell on deaf ears, but there were a few who obliged. i thanked those who did, sincerely. what i do not get, is why others couldn't. you've pooped, shouldn't you clean it up? i don't think infants are qualified for this course. but behaving like that, does spoil the market, ya know? then it won't look so glamorous either.

what's sickening, is those who mark it, and deny it was their doing, believing that "no one's gonna clean it, why should i?". i think we all can play a tiny part somewhere in this gigantic world. step by step and make a difference? even by lets say, sliding the chairs back under the table?

i'm being too optimistic aren't i? and i'm begining to sound holier-than-thou.

well maybe i am.

then maybe i should not exist as well :P

i've got this uber cool new mouse since my old one decided to dysfunction after many great dota battles. it's rather tiny. but it's filled with coloured lights.
it changes, shining from white-green-yellow-red-purple-blue-green-and lotsa in betweens.
its like a mini disco ball. i can turn off the lights, and have my own clubbing scene.
now everyone can club :)

Monday, November 24, 2008

Goreng Your Pocket

my cuz married an english. recently they were down for deepavali. what's really nice about him, he's very open to the malaysian culture and food. ok, maybe he loves the food to be precise. he'd tell his wife to just stay at home, and he'll take the car out to the mamak near their house in kl.

the other day, he went to the mamak and ordered mee goreng and roti canai. the guy's been in and out of malaysia many times. he's been to mamak a gazilion times.

so when he went to pay for his food, he had a jolly good time with the cashier that tried to cheat him.

him: how much is the food?

cashier: six dollar for one roti canai.

him: no. it says 80cents on the board, why are you charging me six dollars? (he points to the board with a smile)

well if the cashier had any sense at all, he would have blushed to stupidity, but i think he was so low on the stupid-scale, he didn't even know the meaning of tak malu!

even with the recent economy rollercoaster, roti canai isn't gonna shoot up to six dollars a piece. well unless of course you're, lets say 30,000feet in the air? :P


its been raining. hence IMC conditions.

and IMC = no flying

rain is only good for sleep.

Sunday, November 16, 2008


spotted: an aircraft jerking forward on start up. was that an indication, or just too much power set? was it a sign to worry? did it really jerk? or was it just rumours spouted to make a bonfire out of matchsticks?

today an aircraft didn't land so safely, as its nose made its way into the green pastures outside of the runway. what exactly happened, i'm not too sure. all i heard was:

"wooo... woo......... WOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!"

and as i directed my attention to the runway outside, i saw the aircraft nose first into the dirt. one would definitely resent the aircraft. one who never wanted to fly that particular aircraft, but is forced to.

slow down. things like this are unavoidable truth be told. like driving school, rolling backwards during the balancing hill test? or even the sudden dead engine when the traffic light turns green? and i mean manual cars btw.

whether it happens to you or not, that's a different story. to begin with, the eagle 150B isn't exactly the idealist's aircraft. categorized as extra light weight, the aircraft is certified to be a trainer aircraft only in malaysia. i think because it is malaysian. usually trainer aircrafts are light aircrafts, get the picture?

landing is the most important part, and its a lot harder when you're flying these types of small aircrafts because speed, height, and power setting is based on your own judgement, especially on solo flights. you can't be scaning to check speed and height when you're nearing threshold, and as you reduce power to prepare for touchdown, your controls become sloppy and inefficient. there is a lag when you turn the controls till when the aircraft actually banks. its not easy.

touching down can be considerate(?) in the sense the runway is more than sufficient in length. the hard part is touching down safely and smoothly. landings can be heavy with a loud "THUMP", leaving you with a sore ass, which i've proven before.

and of course breaking is a big slice of the pie too. though you may have touched down safely on the runway, its not over till you bring the aircraft to a safe slower speed. breaking as well needs careful application. break too fast or unequally, you can safely end up skidding off the runway. i get really nervous when i press on the breaks, sometimes taking too long, sometimes just feeling like i'm gonna lose control of the aircraft.

so like i said, landings are difficult. it all takes a lot of time and practice. worse thing is, losing the feel of the aircraft and judgement, resulting in bad actions. but maybe today wasn't his fault. maybe the aircraft had problems. maybe the throttle faulted during landing. we'll have to wait and see.

i'm sure he's quite shaken up by this incident. its scary even just for me as a passerby. the possibilities and what ever not, runs a chill down my spine. though the ironic thing is, this is particularly what makes it so goddamn interesting for me as well. leaving the aircraft with heart thumping on rage, in one piece.


well the grass will grow back ;P

Friday, November 14, 2008


"i heard there was a local airline had to do emergency landing. you know about it?", he said.

"no. what's it about? where?", i asked.

"heard the captain couldn't use his controls. the ailerons failed and he couldn't turn. he couldn't bank the aircraft. i'm not sure about it, but heard he had to do emergency landing in Kuching."

"emergency landing???", i raised an eyebrow, but i wasn't the only one.

"ya emergency landing. he was taxying, then couldn't control the aircraft, couldn't turn. then not sure but heard ailerons, or maybe RUDDER wasn't working..."

"how to do emergency landing if he's taxying the aircraft?! he's on the ground!", all of us asked in unison. or close to it.

i remember getting an obnoxious statement similar to this before. contradicting from topic to content, bewildering to say the least. fortunately this time, i had a pretty sound mind to actually stomach the words, unlike before, and get the wrongs fished out from the truth.

its quite fantastic how people can make no sense at all, professionally even. i guess they were just trying to take advantage of the situation, and mask their stupidity with mambo jambo jargons. i don't think its fair to drop professional jargons to the unaccustomed, even though its gonna make you look cool (and professional) although you're actually dim-witted. something stinks, maybe its coming from all the crap in your storage head? hmphhh...

this is the very reason stories twist and turn, flip 180 degrees and slaps you with a backhand.

well anyways, a lot of mushrooms have started sprouting wildly over the skies. its become carpeted with mushrooms overhead here in kb. some even as black as shitake mushrooms. yipes! its unpleasant.

i meant clouds by the way. things are getting misunderstood. better be clear.

last but not least, "everyone wants to fly for the national carrier. at the end of the day, i wanna fly for the BA (british airways)", my dear cousin once said. much to be pondered about. tell me that 2years ago (not the BA part of course), it could've hit homerun. now, it doesn't matter. maybe when the perks are unsatisfactory it'll all make sense. maybe.

food for thought:
everyone of us have an independent way of thought. defensive mechanisms, literacy assault, emotion marathons. i'm still questioning myself. i feel i need to know me first, before i question others, or even let others question me. till now, i can't say i know me. do you know yourself?

Thursday, October 30, 2008


you were the glimmer in the sand,
in the yards afar,
the tiny speck of dazzle,
that was blinding with attraction.

the back of my hand was all i knew,
not the distance,
not the size,
nor the attraction you aroused.

an empty sheet i owned,
and with it i painted with unconfident brushes,
what i saw,
and what i felt in my own perceptions.

i made a you,
of divine colours and contour,
but mostly i made a you,
you did not understand or approve.

because you were a tiny speck,
i never contemplated the distance,
or understood why you were blinding to my eyes,
i was never good at the guessing game.

play me a tune; maybe i'll sing,
tell me a story; maybe i'll recite,
give me a map; maybe i'll follow,
but not charades cause i'll be wrong.

you are the glimmer in the sand,
with a million footsteps in between,
shining brightly even in the night,
the diamond i can't afford.

Friday, October 24, 2008

Wronged Ears

i was out looking for a place to laminate my map, but couldn't find one. so i ended up entering the bakery nearby with my navigation map in one hand, coz i have a thing for bakeries. i could spend lotsa money, if i had in the first place, buying buns. no not that buns, but buns made out of flour and yeast and baked in an oven.

so while i was searching for cash in my wallet to pay for my goodies, the cashier was admiring my map. then she enquired about it.

she: dapat dari mana tu?

me: ermmm... sekolah.

she: oh... koperasi jual ke?

me: tak de la... *how should i say it*... sekolah kasi.

(at this point, the map was on the counter coz i was in between keeping my wallet, getting my stuff, so she takes it and has a look)

she: ooo... saya cari peta... yang ada lebuh raya.

me: ni ada. yang warna coklat tu jalan raya. tapi peta ni bahagian utara sahaja.

she: you belajar apa?

me: belajar lesen menerbang.

she: ada ke?

me: yep. saya belajar kat kota bahru ni.

she: oh saya tak tau ada sekolah lesen menebang.

(she admires the map, and suddenly a wave of realization washes over her)

she: you kata lesen meNERbang ke meNEbang?

me: *laughs* menerrrrrbang.

she: alamak. i thought you meant lesen tebang pokok.

the pisang goreng lady had an even more colourful imagination. she thought i went all the way to kota bahru to do form6 in an asrama. gosh. what a nightmare of a thought. what was she thinking?!

i went to the post office today. last time i went there, was to post my application to NUS and NTU. a year on, look where am i now. at the other end of the peninsula.

dreams bring you to different paths. funny how situations provoke you to believing you were meant for something else.

Wednesday, October 22, 2008

Mash The Mush

i was feeding NigelTheBrat, when he pointed to my plate, a sign of what he wanted even though he had his mouth stuffed with rice already.
me: you want this?
he nodded his head.
me: this is mushroom.
then he shook his head vigorously.
he: no noooo... this shroooommmmssss.
kids these days. do they know too much? scarily too much.

Sunday, October 19, 2008


something has happened to my explorer. it does not load my facebook page properly. you know the applications bar at the bottom of the window? that doesn't show at all. and i can't click on all the "send" buttons, like when i type a message, i can't send coz i can't click it. same goes with the wall-to-wall posts.

i cant approve or decline friend request, invitations, etc. now i've got lotsa requests on stand by. and since i'm such a neat freak at times, that's bugging me coz i can't approve or decline and everytime i log in, its just there pointing itself to me. its also gonna get me labelled as stuck up or some shyt like that i'm sure...

i tried logging out and logging in. i tried deleting the history. i tried downloading mozila. it just won't work.

i am such a noob. but i think it's because the connection isn't stable. last time it used to take years to load facebook, now it just doesn't load properly. so i'm blaming it on the connection. hmmm...

i'm so noob-ish eh? hahahaha...

nothing else to say. just felt like blogging coz i haven't blogged much.

oh yea, watched I Know Who Kill Me last night. Lindsay Lohan was in it. the movie was just rather weird. and you know what, blue surgical gloves are freaky. like navy blue ones. there was something in the movie about the colour blue.

blue gloves (for surgery AND investigation), blue books, blue undergarments, blue roses, blue walls, blue cars, blue knives and weapons, there was just a lot of blue.

i think they were strangely obsessed with Blue's Clues.

Sunday, October 12, 2008

One Book Down

i am done with To Kill A Mockingbird. it was different because of it's language. the english was rather american county styled with the many apostraphy(s) (is that how you spell it?) here and there, making words shorter than they originally were. sometimes it's like a lil game of guessing, making out what it stands for.

nevertheless it was good. it was nice to read something from a kid's point of view. about everything from growing up to rape. i think there are quite a few people in this world who would benefit a lot if they read it. sad to know people act the way they are, but at least some of us have come a great deal from them.

sadder the fact that some people have just refused to change.

Boo Radley was an awesome character. i liked the ending part very much. wish there was more of him though. didn't expect to enjoy the book to that extent, but it turned out good. maybe i should read more classics? or the movie next?

distractions in life. very, very bad.

anyways, been under the weather past few days. the usual bouts of tonsils. sigh. its been dreadful. getting better though. dosing up on vitaminC chewables for the flu hahaha... like a small kid :P

the worst thing about panadol, besides the fact of consuming them, is that you start to sweat a lot after some time. there was one night, i was running a pretty high fever. i knew coz i was feeling cold even in my room with the fan switched off. i fell asleep in my sweater and covered under my blanket, then 2 hours later i woke up drenched in sweat. it felt like i had a shower in my bed with sticky salt water. very uncomfortable.

" Shoot all the bluejays you want,
If you can hit 'em,
But remember,
It's a sin to kill a mockingbird. "
-Harper Lee-

Sunday, October 05, 2008


one of the best:

when you get water stuck in your nose, like during swimming, that it makes you start sneezing and your nose becomes really uncomfortable, then finally after many excrutiating minutes or hours bearing water in your nose, it flows out from those nostril sockets, the rush of the once lodged water flowing warmly again is absolutely unforgettable. no more mr uncomfortable nose.

one of the worst:

returning back to these four walls. damn it!

Tuesday, September 30, 2008

RM37 A Tower!

random: NigelTheBrat reminds me of the airbus smell sometimes.

last night was crazy. met up with a few of the guys. night started slow, drinks were cheap, we had loads, then everything was just crazy. its one of those, you had to be there to understand wth i'm talking about, coz if i did explain it, you'd be wondering "is that it?!"

it involved a lot of lame jokes, and a helluva lotta laughter. it was crazy. hadn't laughed my ass off in ages. didn't think it would have gotten that friggin eventful. the old man in the jippa was an odd fit to the whole picture. i surprisingly pissed him off without knowing it. doesn't know we can multitask i guess.

fella underestimate my listening out. doesn't realize i've been trained quite a bit in that area. so wtf?! but at least i got him away from the table :D

topped up 15bucks of petrol for the kancil and the driver goes:

"we got full tank now, so why worry???"

he wanted to tour the whole johor bahru with a so-called full tank. and jb's not small...

the night certainly didn't die early. made it just in time to the mamak for sahur and when i landed on my bed, it was time to fast, or rest for me.

these guys are crazy. we need more mondays like these. eventful i say.

I’ve had a little bit too much,
All of the people start to rush.
-lady gaga "just dance"-

Sunday, September 28, 2008

Aku & Buku

when i was in kl, my friend and i went to a dessert shop. as soon as i sat down, the waitress brought the menu, but held on to it tightly with her dear life. she asked:

"ermmm... nak tanya. you orang apa?"

gave her the truthful answer before she finally placed the menu down on the table. my friend thought the waitress was trying to flirt -.-''

few days later i was in burger king. the cashier there was more straight-forward.

she: are you muslim?

me: no.

she: that will be ten ringgit.

thankyou-ed her and walked off. i think she was more professional?

oh i did go book hunting. i held Switch Bitch in my hands, and so many other Roald Dahl books. but damn were they pricey.

why does money have to be such an arse of a restriction?!

but anyways, i bought Harper Lee's To Kill A Mockingbird instead. been wanting to it read for a long time. it was much cheaper, and more worthied comparing the thickness of the 2 books. no matter, one day i'm gonna own those Roald Dahl books.

started reading it a bit, and it's not bad so far. don't wanna get so hooked on it though, else i won't stop. need to savour the value of the book. as i said money is a friggin arse of a restriction!


Friday, September 26, 2008

Quizzical Choice

the stage lights shone,
brightly upon me in the center stage,
in this building with no one else,
the doors slammed shut silently long ago.

the stage lights shone,
luminescing footsteps left by someone,
all around; even where you used to hide,
i seeked; the footsteps were familiar.

the stage lights shone,
beaming upon an otherwise empty stage,
did you call out my name,
were the curtains just lapping others?

the stage lights shone,
i recall overlooking many on steps that rose,
taking turns being king of the world; you and me,
a world with two kings.

the stage lights shone,
brightly upon me in the center stage,
i wonder alone,
if i should leave too.

Wednesday, September 24, 2008

Navigating KL

did Nav 2 last week and this time the route was a bit more complicated and further. did everything i could to prepare, but there's always never enough preparation, you know what i mean?

this time i did 3 big and unforgettable mistakes:

1) set course wrong timing
2) took shortcut
3) got the wrong kampung

no 1 got my instructor really pissed. never seen him that pissed before. it was total stupidity by me. set course is when you actually start your navigation flight. and that day, when i was cleared to line up, two helicopters cut queue and got clearance to take off first before me. i didn't take note of it, and my timing was wrong. so when i made the radio call to tell them i'm setting course, that got him red. damn stupid i felt.

no 2 got my instructor laughing. he asked me where i was. i looked at the map, and though i should have been on the left, instead i was wayyy right of the river. soooo off course man. i told him, "sir, we're not on track. we should be the other side of the river". that got him laughing like mad. he told me, though i took a shortcut, and that would be very fuel efficient, but the point of navigation is to follow our route. which i wasn't. told me to correct myself. damn malu.

no 3 got my instructor looking puzzled. i was to overhead a little kampung which was damn ulu and it was not prominent. so i told him according to the river bend, the bridge, the hills, the position of the town relative to the other 3 nearby towns, and my VOR needle, that the kampung was my reporting point. he wasn't convinced. and when i turned the next heading, i realized he was right. again i was off course. he told me the reporting point was more to the left. i checked my track and indeed he was right. i was blurrr. what to do if the rivers and and bridge lookalike?

still learning. give me some time! we learn from mistakes, no?

yesterday i was out with my old friend in KL. so we were walking the streets at night, and this lady with a foreign accent comes up to us, asking us for directions to a hotel. my friend doesn't know KL very well. and i really had no clue where that hotel was coz i never heard of it, nor do i know KL well anyways. pity the lady, come ask for help, but ask 2 clueless people. might as well she go fishing.

but hope was not lost, she pulled out a map! i looked at it, and matched the map with the landmarks. marked where we are and alligned the map with our position, and guess-who showed her the way? yours truly of course.

see i've been learning something. i know i'm making such a big huu-haa over nothing :P


Friday, September 19, 2008

Above Average

why do we push ourselves to the limit? bring us to the edge, make ourselves suffer the consequences? why do people want to over-achieve simple matters?

like playing a sport, or taking a run, out till you tire yourself completely of every single drop of energy. only to face the wrath of an inhumane whole body sore the next day. then beg for someone to relieve the pain of our very own doing.

that's just an example. but we tend to do this a lot in our work, assignments, everything we do in life on a daily basis. we go all out to reach the limit, then realize, "is that it?".

is that all its worth?

maybe indirectly it'll bring us closer to something else? maybe the pushing ourselves part itself releases some kind of adrenaline that we all hunger for? maybe by reaching the heights, we hope for some recognition to separate us from the ordinary rest?

whether it is worthied or not, i think its everyone for their own. we all fit in different places of this gigantic puzzle of life, so i guess our purposes serve differently from the person sitting next to you on the bus. and if our purposes serve differently, then obviously whatever we do, we do for different reasons. no?

maybe i'm wrong. maybe we all just do it to take our minds off the other mysteries and burdens of life? i think i would. its an easier option out.

and better than saying " i've got something on "... then again, there's nothing wrong being a perfectionist. although, daggers of envy come with it as a package you can't return.


Sunday, September 14, 2008

To Roald Dahl

yesterday, i was not informed, was Roald Dahl's Day. though i started reading his books at a rather late age, around 12/13, i do like his writings. his children's work, was amazing, and he's got to be the best original kid's book author i have ever known.

original kid's book meaning the imaginary world through the eyes of kids and simple english with a colourful dose of unimaginable characters.

i started out with Charlie & The Chocolate Factory, which was a double dosage including The Glass Elevator. later on, i got my hands on Matilda, The BFG, Boy and a few short stories. i enjoyed his writings a lot. quite odd though, i've not been tempted to read James & The Giant Peach, coz if i remember correctly, they made a movie out of it, and it didn't really appeal to me. maybe i should give it a go?

i quote and second The Star: "It is the theatrical flair characteristic of his works that captures the fancy of many, to the extent that embellishment is glossed over".

for now, i am very tempted to get my hands on Switch Bitch. anyone care to buy me? :P i think i may end up book hunting... it has been awhile since i last did that


Saturday, September 13, 2008

Maps N Watches

completed: IF2, GH8, Nav 1

had 3 days of early morning sorties straight. so that meant i had to wake up early. to top it off, the first day my sortie got cancelled coz of bad weather. what a bummer. wake up early for nuts...

so i did IF2 with 17, and it was good. starting was a bit rusty, but got a hang of it after some time. see, usually we fly visually, meaning we look outside the aircraft to judge our attitude, whether wings level, or if we're climbing or descending. we're not suppose to look at our instruments that provide us height change and aircraft attitude info. but its always easier to look at instruments to fly rather than looking outside.

then when we do IF(instrument flying), we wear a hood, and realize i'm trying to peek outside to see the attitude. i think i'm just a lil confused hahaha...

anyways, IF2 went well, and 17 was cool. what is nice about flying with him is, he's been in our place before. he just graduated a few years ago, so he knows what problems we face as a student. he's more understanding. and he's been through hell before reaching where he is today.

GH8 was a solo sortie, and everything was nice. except the part i had to hold. and hold and hold. for like 15mins. i wasted 15mins holding.

Navigation1 was a brief intro into navigation. the route was pretty much straight, but there's quite a bit to do. luckily i was flying with 17, as i said he's understanding, so he took time to teach which was good. half the time i was lost, not the route part, but the things i had to do hahaha

oh for nav i was suppose to carry a stopwatch, but there was not enough. so i ended up borrowing my friend's watch to use as a stopwatch, and my own watch as a UTC time reference. gosh, i look so stupid with 2 watches lol

mostly the taking off part is a bit troublesome, which i'm still blur about. i think i'll get it in time though. so its HAT at the holding point, set course, then CLEAR, and once in awhile FREDAH checks. and the same routine before, overhead, and after the waypoints on our route.

navigation is mostly map-to-ground reading, so that we constantly know where we are. for example, we make sure we're over a river at a certain time, or beside a hill at this time. its just constant reference to map to locate ourselves. which is not that hard, it just takes a lil time to read the map, while flying the plane, logging in your nav logs, and occasionally answering radio calls. i'm kinda intrigued with map reading actually. its quite fun picking out the features from above. and also finding deserted towns in between valleys faaarrr from civilization. what do they do with their lives?!

the irony, sharman was never a map guy. i was in the boys scout till standard 6, and never ventured it again after that. then again, i was never much of a badan beruniform guy as well :P

but looks like i'm stuck with uniforms though :D

As I was going up the stair,
I met a man who wasn't there.
He wasn't there again today,
I wish,
I wish he'd go away.
- variation of Hughes Mearns poem from the movie "Identity" -

Sunday, September 07, 2008


something funny: "we need to see the effort".

heard this line during briefing today. his english is fine. it's just that i realized, today, out of the blue, that effort, sounds a lot like "f word".

so yea. i was laughing to myself. again. as usual.

simple amusements in life. i think i easily amuse myself. what is wrong with me?! at least it's keeping me sane. i try to think so.

something not so funny: it's been a gloomy day. sortie got cancelled coz of weather. is the monsoon really coming in already? it seems like just yesterday the bad weather cleared up, and now it's back.


Saturday, September 06, 2008

1st Week Of Sept

i flew GH4 with 16, and finally it was a good sortie with him. things went smoothly and at the end, he wrote "student progressing well" on my report form. after the disastrous screwed up circuit revision, i needed this to feel like i wasn't totally useless.

then flew GH7 with 04, and THANK GOD its fasting month. but it was my best flight with his thus far as well. he is satisfied so far with my performance, not good but satisfactory. will need to improve on accuracy and landings.

which brings me, yesterday i flew with 16 again for instrument flying 1 (IF1), all went well, till the landing. it. was. heavy. like THUMP!

damn malu man. came down from flight he said:

"you're flight today ok. but everytime come down from your flight... buntut sakit!"

damn. back to square one. though he meant it as a joke, and though the winds were kinda strong, but its demoralising laaa... NEED TO IMPROVE!

anyways i flew GH5 solo as well during mid week. everything was well, and 04 told me to do a touch & go if got time. so i came back early, did a touch & go and then landed.

went into flight ops, when i was filling my forms, kena marah: SIAPA SURUH BUAT TOUCH & GO?! terus land la etc etc

hehehe right timing, 04 entered flight ops and suddenly i was treated so nicely. don't play play with 04. his presence can silence you! (and not in a dota kinda way)

then yesterday as well flew my GH6 solo. my bad day:

1) checking aircraft, stall horn didn't have sound.
2) engine couldn't start. but both when engineer came, was solved.
3) request bachok, full. so request to go uban. taxiing to runway, advised uban not suitable for solo. so i change for circuit and landings initially.
4) doing circuits, winds damn strong man, didn't dare land the aircraft so just go around TWICE. didn't dare continue circuits so asked to proceed to bachok again.
5) bachok too many clouds, so stayed at 1500ft. doing turns till boring. because of the friggin clouds, keep gaining/losing height.
6) returning to airfield, reciprocating runway in use. omg.

usually we biasa with runway 10, sekali today changed to 28. i was like WTF! panic panic panic. so tried to continue everything, then they ask extend downwind some more, kena hold late downwind, my circuit pattern damn out man hahaha...

then finally proceed with finals, luckily for the strong headwind so it was quite stable, but i was like:

shyt. i'm gonna crash this aircraft. shyt i'm gonna crash. shyt i'm gonna crash.

but realized it wasn't so bad coz of headwind, then calmed myself down and went instead:

just land it safely. land it safely. you can do it. somehow.

managed to land the aircraft in one piece. note to self: if things don't start out right in the first place, prepare for a bumpy ride.

Wednesday, September 03, 2008

Linking Link

if you've noticed, i've added a new blog link, The AirAsia Blog. it just started less than 2 months ago, and its been fun reading posts from both the AirAsians and guests, good and bad.

one of the latest post was about this clip:

i had fun reading it, and it brought a lil smile to my face. there's always something about Yasmin Ahmad's clips and movies. did i fail to mention it was made by her? well, it is. and it was really simple and the message was clear. with a lil 'kritikan sinis', so Pilot Wong please don't get offended.

maybe you guys will think i'm just bias or lame. it just meant something to me. i know there's so much more to come, to expect, i'll accept it when it arrives. and hopefully with open arms :P

truly now everyone can fly,

Saturday, August 30, 2008


I got tagged by Miss Drumma Boi and so here is the game.
Requirement: Write about the age that you wish to go back to, and why.
Tag Mode: 5 bloggers. (I'll just tag a few.)
1st - You link 5 bloggers you want to tag and link their blogs.
2nd - Let the blogger you want to tag know they been tagged by comment in their blog or etc. (Somehow the instructions are pretty weird.)

ok i've been thinking hard about the age i would wanna go back to, and i couldn't really choose a figure. for days i've procrastinated this.

finally just now while having some thinking time on the toilet seat, i came to a consensus with me myself and i, that i'd like to return to the age of 13.

just after i turned 13. coz 13 was also the year you enter highschool, i needed time to settle in. so just after i turn 13 was kinda nice. i knew the school, people, and had a trustable ring of friends. which i am very thankful for coz i still have them.

at 13, school wasn't very heavy? there wasn't any major exams, so mediocre passing marks achieved was sufficient. more than sufficient actually. and subjects weren't that tough as well.

what else what else what else?

at 13, i didn't have much to worry. i think it was pretty care-free. i know it doesn't sound eventful, but i guess 13 had lesser downs compared to the other years.

though 13 didn't have much ups either, but i'd prefer returning to an age where the downs weren't so drastic. so yea.

don't think i started drinking at 13 also :( hahahaha

-the end-

whoever reads this, consider yourself self-tagged. i'm not gonna name drop. too lazy to give. if you read this, have some conscience to do it. coz YOU are TAGGED!

k k sounds so drama ready. maybe coz of my sleeping disorder. past week can't sleep properly. keep waking up early. can't sleep as long as i used to. i'm sleeping less than the average actually.

especially on the weekend! damn!

have a pleasant weekend y'all!

Thursday, August 28, 2008

GH 1, 2, 3; Solo 2,3; Cct Revs!

OMFG. its been a tiring week.

been flying with 04 the past four days straight. first time i'm flying with him, and you really gotta do good man.

he is an amazing pilot. hands down. the man can land an aircraft with just the play of the power. can you imagine it? like using two fingers to land a friggin aircraft?!

flying back to back, four days straight is really tiring. preparation, mentally.

i've become a coffee addict. before flight, i'll take approximately 2 black cuppas. and i usually fly in the evening. morning there's another cup! not like i like coffee, but i need to stay awake.

so anyways, we flew GH 1 & 2, and TWO Cct Revs coz i sucked and needed to do my solo circuits before proceeding with the next exercises. i don't think i flew that well, but i think i'm getting it. i think there's much to absorb from this man. i do feel a lil more confident with what i'm doing. i think i'm begining to understand airmanship and captaincy. just a lil bit clearer, its a longgg way to go...

and though everyday is really hell on earth, but the man is awesome during debrief thus far. and to know he thinks i'm safe to go solo (solo 2 & 3 and GH 3), i realize i need to learn more.

its been an amazing day. i almost felt like i didn't want the rain to stop. but instead i flew. and had the bestest day. flyin 1.5hours solo.

next week, i presume, shall be somewhat the same. little by little, i think i can. its exhausting, maybe its just me.

luckily its the weekend. finally. i went to school at 8am, returned only at 9.30pm today. it doesn't help i had many unsleepable times the previous nights... i'm just tired. merdeka. woo. who.

*GH= general handling.
(i know i didnt really type much. excuse me, i'm tired)

Friday, August 22, 2008

The Incans

i was watching The Motorcycle Diaries, which brought me to wiki about Tupac Amaru, not the rapper, but an Incan king. here is something i found:

In Cuzco in 1589, Don Mancio Serra de Leguisamo — one of the last survivors of the original conquerors of Peru—wrote in the preamble of his will, the following, in parts:

"We found these kingdoms in such good order, and the said Incas governed them in such wise manner that throughout them there was not a thief, nor a vicious man, nor an adulteress, nor was a bad woman admitted among them, nor were there immoral people. The men had honest and useful occupations. The lands, forests, mines, pastures, houses and all kinds of products were regulated and distributed in such sort that each one knew his property without any other person seizing it or occupying it, nor were there law suits respecting it… the motive which obliges me to make this statement is the discharge of my conscience, as I find myself guilty. For we have destroyed by our evil example, the people who had such a government as was enjoyed by these natives. They were so free from the committal of crimes or excesses, as well men as women, that the Indian who had 100,000 pesos worth of gold or silver in his house, left it open merely placing a small stick against the door, as a sign that its master was out. With that, according to their custom, no one could enter or take anything that was there. When they saw that we put locks and keys on our doors, they supposed that it was from fear of them, that they might not kill us, but not because they believed that anyone would steal the property of another. So that when they found that we had thieves among us, and men who sought to make their daughters commit sin, they despised us."

-source wikipedia-

if some people stayed where they are, maybe life would have been better now?

but don't you think its amazing? this great civilization had so much... moral?

and look at what those greedy bastards did.

if the penjajah's never came, if those great civilizations were maintained, would we still have what we have today?

Sunday, August 17, 2008


its quite ridiculous how sometimes the mind wants to do things that doesn't excite the heart.

the other night someone asked me what was written on my shirt, and i didn't know. even though i had worn that shirt many times, i wasn't sure whether it wrote "boarding" or "surfboarding" when asked.

i could have just looked down, and read what it wrote. but it's kinda sad that we tend to overlook such simple stuff. it makes me wonder, what else i let pass me by, unnoticed. so many things may have slipped through this gaze. so many good and bad memories in front of me, absent in the mind.

all went unnoticed.

last night, i was reminded of the old kampung house i used to live in. i tried to remember the finer details of it, especially the second hall. try as i might, but the only thought that came was the fact that it had been congested with stuff. what stuff exactly, i couldn't really remember.

is my memory really failing me? or do we just take things like this lightly? hmmm...

i like to reminisce the past, but it gets disappointing when you come to a halt. your train of thoughts crashes into a boulder of mystery. the familiar self-told story starts looking for a new story-teller.

anyways, speaking of the old kampung house i miss, it had quite a number of trees in its compound of tales. back then, i used to take things for granted. now, the mentality has changed because:

1) after the realization that rambutans and mangoes aren't free, coz we used to pluck them or let them fall off and rot coz we were sick of eating them, or were down with sore throat.

2) and people actually paid for pandan leaves!

hahaha i never bought pandan leaves. we just took the knives and cut them from the plant. that perception lasted for quite a number of years, till i found them at supermarkets. i was shocked.


Thursday, August 14, 2008

Cct Rev

i flew on sunday doing my circuit revision, after slightly more than a month of not flying because of exams. i took up to the skies with a new instructor, 16, and he was pleasantly different.

so basically a circuit is a standard pattern flown above the aerodrome, shaped like a race course. we take off, fly till 500ft, then turn 90degrees right into what we call crosswind, then after sometime we'd take another 90degrees to the right into downwind, where we'd be flying parallel to but opposite in direction of the runway. this is also where we would level off at 1000ft. then once we fly past the entire runway, we turn another 90 degrees right into base leg where we start descending, then turn the final 90degrees into finals where we make our approach for landing. i hope you can imagine that.

well i was thoroughly unfocused the night before, i don't know why. and it showed the day after. the lack of preparation was obvious.

the thing about circuit flying was, though i flew it many times before with 09, but 16 had a different approach on the turnings. with 09, i'd use landmarks to guide when to turn or to make sure of the correct circuit pattern. for eg:

wing approaches water tank, start turn to downwind.
wing touches river, turn base.
when flying downwind, make sure the mosque comes between your legs to fly straight!

this was so much easier to do, but this knowledge was limited to the KB aerodrome only, coz you weren't gonna be finding rivers, water tanks and mosques at other airfields. so i tried learning the 16 way, which was to use my own judgement of distance and fly the circuit.

damn it was hard. i kept turning too early, and i was too near the runway on downwind. so my descending went wrong and the circuit pattern just went out the window.

i was always too high on finals, so i had to keep coming in at a damn steep approach. it was sooooo stupid. no. I was soooo stupid. ridiculous flying man.

one of my friend kinda complimented: eh just now your landing nice man.

me: no la. you crazy or what. it was damn fucked.

friend: no la. you were coming in damn high, but at least you land nicely. you did what, practice force landing or glide approach?

me: ermmm. normal approach laaa.

friend retracts his compliment: oh then quite fuck up la.

which ends up in both of us laughing. pathetic. i tell you, i was damn lucky i was flying with 16, and not 09. else i don't think i'd even be able to be blogging this out. 16 is one patient man, and in the words of another friend, he treats you like a king in the plane. i call it the 16 treatment. absolutely good instructor, with a disappointing student.

then today i was scheduled to fly with 06, who's so kind when he speaks, its unusal and uncommon. but when i turned the ignition key, the engine didn't make a sound at all. the propeller didn't even move an inch. tried another time, but still fail.

aborted start up. all the pre checks for nothing. we got out the aircraft for a cuppa tea. hopefully next week goes better.

note to self: never go unprepared. don't be a lazy ass.

Monday, August 11, 2008

Brand New Day?

i think its time to wake up, and realize the things around you.

i think its about time for you to wake up, and notice that the world is never waiting for you.

i think its time to wake up, and do some self reflection and put into their shoes.

i think its about time for you to wake up, coz you're really not all that special.

i think its time.

Friday, August 08, 2008


It's a thief in the night to come and grab you.
It can creep up inside you and consume you.
A disease of the mind it can control you.
It's too close for comfort.
(this post is gonna be some random things about cadets here)
i don't usually dislike a person, but there's one particular junior who's been on my list of unwanted-ness ever since his first week here.
the first week he came, as usual they were all quiet and kept to their batch and didn't mingle much, pretty much the same like what i did. but the least you can do, if someone smiles at you, is to acknowledge the person. instead when i greeted or smiled, he shows a dildo-up-my-ass (DUMA, for short) face.
fine, maybe he was just nervous on the first week, so i let go. but incident two, i was washing my hands at the wash basin, and i turned to pump some soap, he comes from the side and uses the same tap, no problem. then as i bent down to wash my hands clean of the soap, he turns around and switches the tap OFF with his DUMA face. TWICE this happened!
another day i was on the bus, i sat on the window seat, and people were getting off the bus. as the bus was clearing up, i lifted the arm rest of the aisle seat so it would be easier for me to get out. less than 2seconds i put the arm up while waiting to get out after this guy passes, this guy walks pass and dengan slumbernya pushes the arm down like as if it was a boulder blocking his path, with his DUMA face.
i don't care if his DUMA face is his natural face, but he is annoying. i now choose to ignore his existence even if he stood right beside me. i'm not one who's big on seniority respect, i don't expect any. but you should differentiate respect with plain courtesy/manners. damn these people.
the principal praises one of the most junior-est batches, let's call them batch X, that they were the 2nd best batch of the school. according to him, they should compete and become better than the best ever batch the school has had, batch F.
now batch X seems to think they really are that good.
you may think i'm jealous, but hold on and read on. let me tell you something else. before batch X existed, all the while from batch A to W, the best ever batch that existed were batch C, not batch F (who were just okaay laaa). the principal told everyone from batch A to W, that batch C was the best, not batch F. batch C was always the yardstick.
so, was the principal just trying to motivate batch X to pull up their socks? if he was, its working i guess.
an instructor has nicknamed his students Freddie and Jason. as in Freddie vs Jason. i think the names can give you a very good indication of their acquired flying skills, don't you think so?

Saturday, August 02, 2008

Geography Class

(this happened between a friend and someone who used to work in his house)

he: so where are you from?

she: UK.

he (?!): UK? okaaay. which part?

she: LA.

he (now confused): LA as in Los Angeles?

she: yeaaa. Los Angeles, UK.

wtf?! hahahaha... i couldn't stop laughing.


receiving an mms, very normal.

receiving an mms from my grandfather, very odd.
i think my grandfather is too pimped for me ...

Sunday, July 27, 2008

This And Then

the other day i went back to highschool to get my result's cert. it had been more than a year since i went back there.

the cert has become insignificant in my life. i don't think i will need it, due to the fact i'm bonded for quite some time, and i'm not complaining about it. and also i don't think anyone would wanna see it. its not attractive.

the irony of returning to school was, i used to hate school. and i'm sure many would vouch for that too. the waking up early, homework, uniform etc etc...

not that its much different now, except the uniform :P

as much as i hated highschool back then, i missed it now.

and i'll miss home even more tomorrow.

Friday, July 25, 2008


i've been sitting here surfing the net, flipping through channels to get good music, but to no avail. it happens very often, when you don't get the control of the remote, there's so much on the tube, but when you do actually get the control, there's nothing worth a cent to watch or listen.

so i do the wisest and economical thing, i switch it off, coz the electricity bill needs to be paid every end-of-the-month time.

sometimes i don't give up so easily. i wait for something good to come on, like how i used to wait for the ice cream man.

eager. hopeful. with a whole lot of anticipation.

but the despair and heartache that comes when he doesn't show up, especially if you've saved your school money and waited the whole afternoon for him, is sadder than the tears of a clown.

its like cloud 9 turning to dark clouds. you're lucky charm rusting in the rain.

i know they say good things happen to those who wait, but exactly how do i know for which do i wait upon? its hard to give up waiting if there is some sense of reciprocation, but its also a harder fall if waiting leads you to a dead-end.

i'm not saying i don't wait, but when do we stop from becoming humty dumty?

The Ball Is Round

and we are never satisfied. we try to think we are, but we're not. there's always that voice under the havoc, wanting for more. taunting you.

we look for flaws, and we pick on it to live. the tiny crack on the wall, the obscure scratch on the handphone, the way you walk and talk. we refuse to accept the fact that something could be perfect if some aspects of it were ignored, so we thrive to find flaws and mistakes and divulge in it to bring yourself some sense of satisfaction.

but at the end of the day, you're never satisfied. the thing you thought was perfect, in the end is not and we're back to square one. unsatisfied, and probably depressed too.

hmmmm... maybe i'm just thinking too much.

Tuesday, July 22, 2008

Sweet Dreams

i have been trying to catch up with the silver screen the past few days. i thought this time around i could catch the incredible hulk in theaters, but unfortunately i had run out of luck. they stopped playing it the day i came back. dang!

and there's been so much rave and good feedback, and i had a lotta anticipation for this new hulk movie. sadly couldn't watch it, looks like its gonna be the dvds.

however i did catch The Dark Knight which was just superb. it lasted like 2.5hours, but it was so damn blardy gewd! the joker was psychotically entertaining. heath really made a good joker, why did he have to die? and there was a special guest appearance by two face, which was really unexpected but i couldn't complained! everything was just good in it. except i really felt i needed to pee hahaha

and christian bale, does he have a short tongue?

i watched Wanted to. the storyline was not so good, but it was a good past time. angelina jolie was hot! i never really thought she was cun, but the first scene she enters with the white dress, she made good of the druggy look. seriously, you might wanna just watch the movie because of her.

internet at home is having some problems, else i would have put up some pics.

anyways, the other night IvanTheTerrible wished me good night, and like a good person i replied "good night. sweet dreams".

ITT: noooooo. i don't want dreams anymoreee...

me: why?

ITT: because i get lost in the dream. i don't want to dream anymore...

hahahaha gosh. really took me by surprised. must have had a nightmare in a maze or something i guess.

before i go, thought i'd share this saying i read, though you people out there are gonna call me a drunkard, but i think its worth sharing (since i'm such a nice person):

"alcohol is the answer. but i don't remember the question".


Thursday, July 10, 2008

At The Warung

time to play the "count the backstabbers" game again. 'yay'.

him: ais kosong satu.

she: apa?


she: HAH?!


she: AIR KOTOR?!!

Monday, July 07, 2008

Getting There

lookout. there's a new guy in the sky. APAC 1168 is officially online so look up!

i finally went on my first solo flight today. and it was simply amazing.

running up to today, i was more worried about my solo check than the solo itself. 'solo check' is basically a test where we do take-off and landings above the aerodrome, and the instructor will decide whether or not to clear the student and send him for solo.

so yesterday i saw my instructor, and he's all happy and just tells me 'well tomorrow morning just make sure you shave, shower, and shit. remember those 3 things!'

he is quite unpredictable la basically.

anyways during my solo check i screwed up quite a bit. really dumb stupid atrociously silly mistakes, like not maintaing height/speed/power. and boy i thought i wasn't gonna pass the check.

thank God my landings made up for that. prior to this, my landings used to be horrible. once, in the early stages of learning how to land, my instructor yelled, "are you trying to kill all 3 of us in the plane?!"

it was NOT funny.

surprisingly, even to myself, my landings today was good. i didn't baloon, landing wasn't hard, or even out of control (which usually IS the case).

so he cleared me for solo, but not before a few questions:

him: can you MAINTAIN yr height and speed and power?

me: yes sir.

him: are you SURE?!

me: yes sir.

him: are you confident?

me: yes sir.

him: ok, i'm clearing you for solo. do your pre take off checks and don't forget to...

it was more than just music to my ears. it was unbelieveable. and i started to fumble with my checks. always rechecking if the fuel pump was on, lights on, fuel correct tank, etc etc..

finally i said:

"kota baru ground, APAC 09Siera ready for taxi", and there was no turning back. i started to freak out. taking off isn't so hard, landing is the worry. as they say, "taking off is optional, landing is not".

then i lined up, did my checks, got clearance for take off, advanced to 2000RPM let go of the brakes, and advanced to full throttle.

so far so good.

40 kts. 45 kts. increasing rather slowly.

and i checked my rpm, and it was stuck at 2100, when in fact it should have been somewhere around 2600.

should i freaking abort? THINK THINK THINK SHARMAN!

so i did what an engineer once did, reduce power a little and advanced it back to full power. luckily it worked and the power increased steadily. reached 65kts and i rotated. maintained an attitude for 80kts, trimmed the aircraft, and carried on as usual.

i don't know why but my speed was too high, or i was gaining height, which i started to freak out coz i was suppose to start descending soon, even though my power settings were normal for cruise.

luckily i made some adjustments along the way, reached finals at the correct height, maintained my rate of descent and speed, which was the most important thing. staying on centreline wasn't so difficult with the light winds.

everything went well. i reached above the runway threshold, pulled back on the control collumn to straighten the aircraft then cut power. and the aircraft didnt balloon! to my amazement! ballooning is when you increase the aircraft's nose too high that it starts gaining height, and you do not want it to happen.

flared out nicely and the aircraft just sinked so smoothly on the runway. it lost height, wings were level, and slowly just touched the runway with the main wheels and then i lowered the nose wheel to get all 3 wheels back on solid ground. best ever landing i had ever done. it was amazing. i couldn't believe i did it.

i did not kill myself, or even damage the aircraft. i friggin flew a plane by myself, and landed it all alone. my instructor thought me well :D i friggin landed the aircraft!

during lunch he came over and congratulated me on my first solo. he smiled. it was satisfying to know i didn't disappoint him, like how i usually do.

sometimes its not hard to feel tiny in this massive industry. it still freaks me out that i'm actually here. it feels like its too big for me. more than i can grasp. but today just proved to me how in love i am with the industry when you actually realize with time and guidance, you can do it. may take a lil longer, but its worth the wait.

its really hard to put in words what i'm feeling. its like that itch that you just can't seem to scratch. the smirk you can't seem to wipe off. you just have to experience it yourself to know what's it all about.

might not be about landing an aircraft for you, but there's just something in your life that's gonna leave a psychotic smile on your face. and when you do find it, you just wanna live off it and suck all of its every tiny essence of euphoria it has.

for me, i'm more-than-words-can-describe happy that today went so well. it wasn't perfect, but it was perfect to me. and you know what?

i live another day to do it again and again and again..

signing out,
APAC 1168.

- The difficult takes time, the impossible just takes a little longer -