Sometimes I wonder if I've grown up too fast? Is that even a valid question I ask myself on other days. As you can see, my mind is a complete mess. Still undecided on which side of the line it wants to be.
The other day while driving back after a really long day at work, I started smiling to myself watching the raindrops on my car. Prior to that I was really pissy because I was plain exhausted. You see, when I was younger, I remember sitting in the car watching the rain drops wiggle away trying to "run away" from the wipers while my mom drove. Making a little scene ala a short disney movie about rain drops on windshields. In flight entertainment of sorts.
I used to make up noises and conversations in my head, putting voices to those raindrops. Sometimes it was a race, sometimes it was just running for safety. All in the span of 5 seconds before the wipers wiped them out. You can imagine how many re-runs there were!
I don't know why I suddenly remembered doing this, or when I stopped doing this in the process of growing up. But it calmed me and made me forget a lot of things I was worried about.
I tried to dig up my memories and think about other unusual things I had done but I could not recall. I do wonder though, do we lose a little of ourselves as we grow up? These little things that may have defined you as a kid, the same things that make adults go, " oh i remember when you were young you used to do this and that, but what happened to you now? "
Oh, must be life! That must be it. Life tamed me. It stole my innonce, ignorance and simplistic happiness and left me with "responsibility" instead. How nice :p