A Simple Life

i watched this film yesterday, and it pulled a lot of hidden strings in me. there were so many parts which i felt relatable. scenes where it almost felt like i was watching me from the outside looking in.

the drama starts slow. it almost felt dry, and i almost was wondering what i had gotten myself into. almost, because the movie picks up soon enough. i was really amused with how humour had left me laughing in stitches despite the inevitable sad note the movie is set in. the beauty in all of it is the conversations i think.

about two weeks back, i had the honour of driving one of my friend's nanny. while we drove, we spoke of many things like my friend's childhood, what she was like as a kid, how she's changed etc etc. like her, i also had a nanny that practically lived with us. like her, the nanny was with the family even longer than i had been.

see for those of us privileged to have another mother figure in the form of Tao Jie, it's hard to grasp and explain our relationship and dynamics of the whole family. sure she was paid, but never would we treat her like she was paid. she was indeed family. closest Roger could call himself was her godson, but i'm sure in truth, even godson is an understatement.

i grew up a certain amount of years, not realizing my nanny back then, wasn't blood related. she was there in family pictures before me. she was there when i was born, changing my napkins, feeding me food, buying me toys, she was there every step of the way. it's hard to explain if you have not been in the same situation because back then, our nannies were family.

it didn't help that i called her grandmother. or the fact i had never met my real grandmother. for many years, she was my actual grandmother in my mind till i eventually made out the whole scenario and why she had her own family.

when you realize this lady who's been taking care of you all your life like your own flesh and blood, i do wonder how she did it all. i do wonder, was it wrong for me to want her when she had her own family. was it fair?

in the movie, you see that wall breaking down between employer and employee. you see it in the conversations, how they tease each other, how they speak and treat each other, how they reminisce. the movie if it doesn't affect you anyhow, i'm sure the least it would do is remind you to appreciate life, for that is all we have. to be nicer. to be kinder. to give back.

watch this movie. it left me in tears, for laughter and otherwise.

" warm your hearts,

before the end of the world. "

Cockpit Conversations

Capt: you think we can go for flight or not?

Me: i don't think so.

Capt: i go back early also no point. my wife not here.

Me: where she went? holiday?

Capt: my wife went back to see her mother.

Me: oh okay.





Me: then we go search for you new wife la!

Capt: waaaah you sangat pandai ah!!! mau saya tinggal seorang seorang. you tau i sudah tua lagi mau saya cari wife baru. nanti my wife halau me!

Water Breathing Dragon

It's a new year! Hope everyone's having a splashing new year. This blog needs a splash of life too. Have been far too busy letting life get me by lately.

Things get a little frustrating sometimes. Everything moves so fast, it's the end of a year, and beginning of another. All I can remember was getting out of bed at ungodly hours. Was that really all?

There was a time I remember lying in a foreign bed far away and isolated with unfamiliar faces, wishing my biggest wish.

That I'd be exactly where I am, here, now, today. At that time, I'd give anything to be here. For at that time, this life was the perfect one. The greenest pastures on the other side.

But when you're finally where you wished to be, then what? What comes next? I guess it's normal to feel unsatisfied and unfulfilled.

Stop. Breathe. Time to remember to be grateful to the loving family, the great friends who have come and stayed on, the good memories, laughs and tears.

If this isn't enough, or just wasn't good, how would I have it? I've been reading a little more than usual lately. I keep forgetting life can be worse. And if I had it like that, how would I cope?

I can't imagine.

So time to brush the weightless off my shoulders, and be thankful for all that's here now. Family, friends, opportunities, and a working mind, body, soul.

Happy New Year everyone!

Loaded

"... can't keep their mouths shut, can't keep their noses out of people's business.

... I hear what she says about him, what she exposes about his life when he's not here, and then I wonder what she says about me when I'm not there. I keep my mouth shut."

words of christos tsiolkas.
Sent from my BlackBerry® smartphone

You Play Love Like A Fool

"the sense of ending" is a beautiful book. literally. i love how crisp and dark it has been made. i'm usually not a fan of hard covers, but it has a really nice feel. i love the black edges too. oh, and the story's good. i feel like i'm in an all-boys school once again. i feel like i've met adrian, anthony, colin, or alex before. like there was actually five of us. like i was sitting on a wooden chair at my wooden desk again with the morning dampness in the air, with teachers you love and hate preaching their philosophies.

haven't felt lost in something, other than reality, for so long.

it's been ages since i've picked up a book. i realized, this is only my second buy for the year.

i've become a slow reader. but damn it feels good. definitely worth the wait making that mph assistant search for it for half an hour aimlessly. bliss.