Give It Two Good Blows

i've always wanted to learn how to do cardio pulmonary resusitation (cpr). don't know exactly why. probably because its heroic to be saving a life. imagine how phenomenon it'd be to give jessica alba or beyonce the kiss of life! watching too much grey's anatomy i guess. or was it baywatch? (rofl)

but i didn't want to be attached to a licence to kill as well. plus, 5-7 years in medical school would definitely make me go bonkers without a doubt. no, i was never willing to give up that much of my life, no matter how noble i found the profession. i think i could serve the world better in different ways.

today, i got a chance to learn. well, it was unavoidable frankly speaking. its part of the areas we need to cover. just as a matter of caution. general knowledge kinda thing. because if something were to happen requiring cpr in-flight, the flight attendants would assume the primary roles. we in the flight deck, can't leave the aircraft unmanned. unless situation really deteriotes to an unthinkable point.

so if a person is seemingly unconscious, what do you do? you look for Dr. Abc!

D - dangerous. clear area of anything that may harm the fellow like sharp objects.

R - response. check verbally if the fellow really unconscious. squeezing his testicles is considered sexual harassment. instead, ask him, "sir are you ok? sir can you hear me?". if no reply, then safe to say he is unconscious. then shout out to a passerby, "call 911!".

oops. 999 i mean. 911 tak laku over here.

A - airway. not airways like golf466 and whiskey525 fellow airmen out there. it means to make sure he can breathe without obstruction. especially his tongue doesn't block his breathing. also check if there are any foreign objects down his throat. like fishball, furball, or maybe his own balls.

B - breathing. confirm no breathing by looking for movements of his chest, listening out for an exhale, and feeling for warmth of expired air. confirmed no breathing? proceed.

C - circulation. give him 2 good blows. the 2 best blow job you could ever give. ventillation, i mean. then proceed with 30 chest compressions, for every 2 ventillations.

remember, the secret is all in the hands, and your 2 good blows. after the blow job, lookout for an erection. eh REACTION, not erection!

the other day i was listening to FlyFm,

they were talking about weird names,

and one caller said he met a girl named Abcd,

pronounced as "ab-see-dii". creative!