If This Continues...

i'd probably crack my balls and go infertile.






futsal, i mean.

If I Was A Doctor

what kind of doctor would i be? i seriously thought i'd be a vet, never a doctor. but apparently i have the face of a penis specialist. if there's anything of such.


last weekend i was in a supermarket in kb town, minding my own business in the drinks section.

DRINKS AS IN CORDIAL AND CANNED AND FIZZY DRINKS!

there was this old chinese man, working there, stacking up the pile of multicoloured bottles and cans. there was no one else in the alley, and suddenly he turns to me and our conversation awkwardly begins.

(conversation originally in malay)

ocm (old chinese man): u malay?

me: no. indian.

ocm: from india?

me: (gosh how shallow minded) nooooo. from johor bahru. i come here to study.

ocm: ooo... u don't look indian. u mix? mother chinese?

me: ermm... ya.

ocm: you can speak chinese?

me: no not really. very little. very bad.

then he starts giving me, yet again "i've heard it before" lecture, how important we should know our mother tongue. mandrin very important. go anywhere, english and mandrin most important. not malay. bla de bla de bla bla...

hence continues the conversation in mandrin. whoever who knows me can imagine how horrible my mandrin was. i could understand. but omg my replies were so friggin limited mannnn.

and oh yea after the lecture, he suddenly remembers i'm a student...

ocm: so where u studying?

me: usm.

the usm campus here is the medical faculty. just for the fun of it, my friends and i like to say we're from there. no reason. konon mysterious laaa...

ocm: ooooo so u gonna be a doctor?

me: erm yeaaa *and gleams*

THEN HE GOES QUIET AND HUSHES OUT...

ocm: can i ask u one question?

me: yea sure... (thought i was dead la he gonna ask me some medical Q)

ocm: do u have to go for operation or got medicine to make it longer and stronger?

remember. this is all going on in mandrin. i seriously tried not to laugh, but this poor man was so serious! so...

me: *honestly* i dont know.

ocm: isnt there medicine?

me: *laughs* got la, but no guarantee.

ocm: you know where to do or get medicine? now people here all have to go thailand. if you can do here, i assure u, u will be rich! i can bring u customer. a lot of ppl want to do, but too ma fan to go thailand. seriously, u do this, u rich. i know a lot of ppl.

me: *laughs some more* dont know la. never learn yet...

ocm: but really, got operation? or medicine?

(then he takes this drink. its VITA or something like that. its kiwi juice in a glass bottle, diametre pretty big)

ocm: *grips the bottle ala ...* like this. strong and long. then only women satisfied.

(at this point, i felt sorry but couldnt stop laughing at the man laaa)

ocm: you find out more can? then next time i bring u customer. a lot of ppl in kb i know want to do. sure good business!

me: sorry uncle. have to go ready. *still laughing*

ocm: oh ok ok. u find our more la. next time tell me what u find out. see u again!


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so atta, what is your opinion?

lol.


dont know when i'm gonna go back there man.

Songs

i think J Timberlake is a reaaally sad case.

he sings:

"Ayo!!!! I'm tired of usin technology
Why don't you sit down on top of me?
Ayo!!!! I'm tired of usin' technology
I need you right in front of me"


doesn't that say something? hmmmm....


am very much addicted to this line:

*everybody sing along*

"I REALIZE, I'M DROWNING IN AN OCEAN...

SOMEBODY COME TAKE ME AWAYYY!"

Dreams & SOT

SOT meaning "some other things". i haven't had much *insipid* inspiration to blog about so i guess most of my posts are gonna be SOTs. the blogging drive seems to have been depleted. i think its the KB air. or the lack of it.

i had this really peculiar dream last night. i was to deliver some sacred relic (do NOT ask me the timeframe) from somewhere to somewhere. don't remember the exact details but it involved Dato Michelle Yeoh in a green chinese fairy/empress dress, swirling around trying to gain my trust (don't know why either). see she was suppose to be some kind of bodyguard of mine against some mean guy who's also after that scared relic. and she could transform into weird creatures. talk about transformers!

dream went on, and as usual, it ended with apnoea.

APNOEA- cessation of breathing when asleep.

another random dream, not last night, but has been re-occuring a few times already, is bout my ol' fish tank. with gold fishes. in my ol' house. it starts with me in the house, realizing i haven't fed the fish nor cleaned the tank in awhile, turning around to find the tank spotless of algae and fish well fed. which amazes me, and i just stop and stare at the tank till i wake up.

anybody read dreams?

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oh gosh i've got shit loads to read up on. the manuals manuals manuals. haven't opened it till today, and not to say i read much today either. i'm so friggin deadmeat in a frying pan!

then there's Met to read up on again. i am SOOOOOO gone.

being home isn't making it easier. its just been so long since i enjoyed doing nothing. then as the days go by, that awful remorse of not doing what you're suppose to be doing grows larger. i am such a goner...

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Nigel"BiscuitBoy" (NBB) is so funny to watch. seeing him running. off balance. almost falling. hands waving everywhere.

then when he falls, he just lays there till someone carries him. such a biscuitboy. and he's so nice to hug. and nobody understand what he's yapping. AND he pronounces "5" as five-ish.

then there's ITT and his nonsense talk and endless "whys". imagine trying to give a logical answer to WHY i can drive, or WHY that stranger is talking on the phone by the road.

-i miss my bed in this house-

Shinkaisan!

few weeks back i had this particular dream which was kinda weird.

i rented this apartment. it was those with two floors (gosh i cant remember the word at the moment which is very frustrating). so yea THOSE kinda apartments.

apparently the timeline was after graduation from kb. so i was suppose to start 'working'.

the apartment was fully furnished. all white. like gila2 white and metal, you know those futuristic-styled furnishing? kinda cool la. had a bar. (i am NOT a drunkard). and everything was very white. with funny wuzzy shaped furniture! and the apartment was in kl. but very quiet area, though near clubs and sorts. and they had shuttle service right below the apartments to the airport.

all for a mere 4oo bucks a month. damn gila cheap man.

but the only slack part, the top floor was just an entry to the bedroom. an the bedroom can only fit one single bed (but it was those really comfortable looking bed on the floor with excess comfortability, if that makes sense). and it was already furnished with sorts of things.

and the whole apartment only got one bedroom -.-"



anyways, i think it was because i watched too much Good Luck at that time.


*Good Luck- japanese drama bout an ANA pilot